Areas of Counselling

                                                                                                                               ‘Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. You have to work out whether your root was so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part and when it subsides you have to make a decision.
Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.
That is just being in love, which any fool can do.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.
Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two.’   by Louis de Bernières

As a professional, your counsellor should be fully qualified to at least Diploma level, not just a basic counsellor’s certificate.  Extra qualifications (usually diplomas or university certificates),  should be achieved for working with  children, couples, families, sex therapy, mediation or even specific theories. Short courses are not qualifications; it usually takes a minimum of one year. Psychodynamic Sex Therapists for example need another Diploma. Don’t be afraid to ask your therapist for evidence. In addition, ask how many uninterrupted years of practice they have had.

My clients are:

Singles – Couples – Families – Children – Work Colleagues –  Friendships – LGBT

 Theories I am qualified to offer:

Person-Centred Therapy – CBT –  TA – Psychodynamic Therapy – Systems Theory – Psychosexual Therapy – Integrative.

Author of :  Parental Guidance for Divorce or Separation: Helping parents to separate or divorce, in the ‘Best Interest of the Child’. https://amzn.eu/d/ez7bPMc

My subjects:

Anything to do with relationships – pre-co-habitation/pre-natal guidance –parental guidance – reconciliation – divorce and separation – Sexual and Domestic Abuse – Anger Management – Affairs – Sexual Issues and functioning – Stress – Anxiety – Childhood issues – Mediation and Disputes – Illnesses and Disabilities – Relationship management. etc

 

Specialist Subjects:

Relationships – Children – Mediation – Childhood Sexual Abuse – Psychosexual

 

Signs you have relationship problems

It is normal for relationships to suffer as the pressure and strains of everyday life mount. Love may disappear, replaced by resentment and anger. Each partner can view this differently depending on their own experience of family life. One may despair, while the other may view it as a temporary blip.

  • communication breaks down
  • sex has ended or causes problems
  • arguments continue without resolution
  • Anger or violent eruptions
  • nagging
  • depression or other health problems recur
  • the bond of trust is eroded or broken.

 

Things are not always as they seem – affairs for instance, need NOT mean the end, indeed, for some couples it is the beginning of a much deeper and healthier relationship.   Affairs, relationship breakdown, depression, anger, stress, anxiety, drinking, eating disorders etc can be symptoms of an underlying problem such as sexual issues, past issues, work issues etc which is not being dealt with.  These symptoms are often a ‘flag’ used to draw attention to a problem. A way of saying HELP!  Sometimes people think that they want to divorce when in actual fact they have other issues which are too difficult to deal with so they focus on something which they can control, like divorce.

Is this you:

  • Wanting to speak to someone urgently and tired of being told you are on a waiting list? Sometimes a double waiting list and don’t want to wait for an appointment?
  • In need some support or guidance?
  • Your Relationship in trouble?
  • In shock after discovering your partner is having affair?
  • Traumatised through eg:Death,Rape, act of Anger, Accident, Violence, Illness or Disability or had some Shocking News,
  • Remembering Childhood abuse that has finally come to the surface.
  • Feeling panicky, afraid, confused, angry, sad, devastated, worried, shocked, depressed, lost, lonely or just uneasy?
  • You are gay and afraid you will not be accepted or listened to.
  • Cannot cope being a parent
  • Cannot sort out contact or residence for the children?
  • Want help to pass counselling assignments?
  • Not happy sexually?
  • Low self-esteem?

Then you have come to the right place!

 

Couple and singles counselling

Some issues I work with:

  • Preparation for: Pre-co-habitation, pre-marital, pre-natal or pre-divorce.
  • Parenting and the effect on your couples relationship
  • Reconciliation or separation
  • Life skills
  • Sexual problems – for couples or singles
  • Rape or Sexual abuse (past or present) – is it affecting your relationship
  • Violence
  • Anger issues/management
  • Physical abuse (past or present) – it could be affecting your relationship
  • Affairs – they do not just happen, there is usually a reason
  • Keeping your relationship going- you do have to work at it
  • Trying to keep everyone happy
  • Should I go or should I stay?
  • Will I cause damage to the kids?
  • General guidance
  • Parental guidance
  • Divorce / Separation guidance
  • Want to talk something through for clarity or make important decisions.
  • Want help and guidance to decide the next move
  • Explore past or current issues, or future events
  • Need to resolve difference with someone – family member not getting on with another family member.
  • Think your ‘going mad’ or maybe your partner has said that you are (Gaslighting)
  • Not sure if you are still ‘in love’
  • Feel stuck or trapped
  • Don’t know how to break the news – particularly to children.
  • He/She doesn’t want sex
  • ‘He is only nice when he wants sex’
  • We repeat the same old patterns
  • Is change possible and will it last?
  • Don’t want to repeat habits or patterns

 

Children and youths counselling

Some issues I work with:

  • Stress
  • Friends
  • Bullying
  • Social Media
  • Children of separating or separated parents
  • Contact Issues
  • Self – Harming
  • Pressure
  • Abuse
  • Relationships

 

Family Mediation

Some issues I work with:

  • Family Conflict
  • Contact Issues
  • Neighbourhood disputes
  • Workplace disputes
  • Issues between friends

 

Psychosexual Therapy

Some issues I work with:

  • Erectile Dysfunctions
  • No Desire
  • Vaginismus
  • Disability Issues
  • Fear of sex
  • Sexual abuse victims
  • Effects of affairs
  • Loss of confidence
  • Penile dysfunctions

 

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